my bestie... the crazy woman...

since everyone is sort of closing their 2009 blog, my bestie asked me to check out another friend's blog. and usually when i check out one blog, i'll go check out the other blogs that i follow.

Please go here and read it before i can continue...

DONE?

okay, it all started from her craze of bags... which i tot has been fulfilled since she got two last monday but that didn't happen... so moving on.
now...
once she knew she got her bag, she blogged about it
then we she got her bag, she blogged about it
then before she went to sleep, she blogged about the bags... again... TWICE.
while one might think that this woman couldn't be crazier...
she blogged AGAIN... eh wait, no... her BAG BLOGGED.
percaya tak? the bag is so genius the it can blog.
see now, one would finally understand why this woman would love her bag so much.
the bags are not only pretty, they are computer literates as well!

haha, babe, your blog posting did not only make my day, it reminded me of why we're mates... despites all our annoyingness and cat fights, we have each other's best interest at heart.
and come 2010, we'll be friends for 12 years! isk... tua nye!
haha... can u believe it we even forgot our meeting that was supposed to be in front of Sri Aman 2 years ago...

isk, bimBo-es lah!

money talks? money WALKS... OUT ON ME! :(

a chunk (i won't say how big if not for sure someone out there will 'pau' me) of money fell on my lap today. and before the money has the chance of being cleared in my bank account, i already have a big list of debts that i need to settle.
1. car insurance n road tax
2. the debt to daddy that i have been shamelessly keeping quiet
3. saving up for my trip
4. house loan, yadda yadda yadda
to simplify it.
it's money... NO MORE.

whilst i am very the thankful that i have the resources to pay off all my debts, i wonder why we have to pay so much to the government.

i pay road tax but the roads are still berlopak2, not to mention hazardous.
the public toilets are still dirty...

money => difficult to come, VERY EASY TO GO!

i'm FINALLY at peace with myself... everyone else can...

SUCK IT!!!

to be content with what i am... or who i am took longer than i expected.
but i'm there now. and no one can rain on my parade.

so here's what im telling u...
SUCK IT baby!

someday i wish to be back to this.

my dear sis is living it up in Sheffield UK.
we miss u. n pray that we have enough money to visit u.

ahh... and at this very moment, TROUBLE IS A FRIEND by Lenka rung from one of my colleague's phone. very true indeed...

a rather splendid weekend, if i may say so

my weekend bonanza started off with adam's birthday on 17th December 2009.
My bouncing baby is now one year and is ready to conquer the world!


Here's MR Muhammad Adam Danish bin Mohd Syazwan
One Year Young...

Adam's birthday was held at KFC Extreme Park, in Shah Alam and it was a good turnout. So good that we didn't have enough time to spend with everyone. However, i would commend KFC on the great job and would definitely recommend anyone thinking of having their child's birthday to do it there as gifts were aplenty and the cost was not too bad considering the fact that all we had to do was have fun... OUH... and thanks for the gifts people. you have saved us TONNES in cash. and for that, XOXO!!!




Adam with Atok & Nenek

The scene before the havoc

Stylo Baby Qish


















Us & the birthday boy










Happy birthday to you~~~~~
mummy & daddy loves u very much!

ALL in ALL we had a wonderful time... thanks for everyone who came.

After the party, some of us headed back to our place in BBSA to hang out. Some of us hung out until 3am. Some of us until 5am. and some of us slept at 11pm. Ha ha... nonetheless, it was a fun sleepover and hopefully everyone enjoyed it as much as we did!

If Adam's 2nd birthday bash is anything better than his 1st, then i'm definitely looking forward to it!

xoxo,
mummy adam.

i hate to tell myself i told you so... but!

I TOLD MYSELF SO!
i knew ms dodol will make a big fuss over me wearing the uniform and wanted to take a photo of me in it. but thankfully... tak sempat.
anyway, you can read about it soon enough, i bet... here!
NONETHELESS... i had fun babes. nanti blanje i satu ringgit lagi k! :p

birds chirping, people laughing. most importantly, ME laughing!

After what seemed like 2 months of pure torture and paperworks, we finally handed in our second in a row project on Tuesday. Yesterday, my boss and i went for a presentation. and i think we finally have room to breathe now. Kak wani can concentrate on being a fiancee and i can concentrate on... the many things i have put behind... too many to name.
for the first time in a very long time.
i can hear the birds chirping.
people laughing.
i cudn't remember the last time me and kak wani laughed this hard until we cried.
it was like a big burden off our shoulders. so big that it took 2 cars to submit. and a possibly upset Technical Manager that we had to put that much load on his new car.
oh well, duty calls! :)
however, my Client just called and told me another project is due at the End of Jan. but... that's January talk. i think i'll enjoy December first, tqvm.
Adam's one today and we're havin his bday party in KFC tomorrow. will try to upload photos, but don't count on it since im such a lazy2 bum. we have tried to invite everyone but due to money constraints and space constraints so we could only invite our close mates...
oh i'm considering joining back the gym. but that depends on my time though. i hope i can work something out. i miss hanging out at CF. altho it is pricy. i have to admit it is a pretty fun gym. and plus a fun gym mate, it wudnt even feel like working out. wait ye aishah, i will try to join u again.
oh speaking about ms aishah (yarabbi sorry this post is going from one topic to another but you chose to read it, so... ) we're having our BK lunch soon. it feels like forever since we actually hung out. and eventho its only an hour, it's ok. it's a start i guess. but she will feel like going out with a factory worker since im wearing my office's uniform and well, let's face it. it looks like a factory worker's shirt. shh... don't tell my dad coz he designed it!
it's almost 12.30 and im waiting for the green light from aishah.
see u later!

adam's turning 1 and i'm still...

a) ALIVE
hehehe... most importantly, so is he! the most clingyest, charmingness, want to bite pipiness boy is turning one in three days and i'm still alive.

b) FAT
okay, that may be a bit out of the line. but while i have lost the weight - numbers wise, i haven't lost it, flabby flat tirey wise. Oh God, i wish Awan never reads this since i always lectured him on using proper English. Oh well, im not perfect!

c) AN UNREGISTERED QS
okay, this part i have to admit is entirely my fault. i was supposed to submit my two year diary this year and it's 14th december and i'm nowhere near done. my dad has been lecturing me as to when i'm gonna do it. and... well, i don't know. i wish i have a clone. Scientists, bile lagi ni???

d) DRIVING MY SWIFTY
i don't have the money, therefore, i haven't had the chance to change my wheels. BUT... it's gone from dull grey to fiery red. Well, Mitsubishi red tho cause i can't afford the Suzuki Red.

e) CRAZY
err... i don't think i have to elaborate on this, do i?

since i was interrupted while drafting this post, i guess i better end this post.
nonetheless, happy bday baby!!!

Dear Adam Danish...

My dear son, Adam Danish...
looking back at all your photos brought back so much wonderful memories of the three of us together. The other one being your daddy, of course... :)
Over the past 10 months, I have had numerous headaches, aching back pains and aches everywhere, going up and down, waking up in the middle of the nite only to find you pressed firmly against my body (coz u are such a lasak sleeper) and haven't been able to wake up late.
You pushed me to my every limit, giving me the strength i never knew i had within. I've always been someone to love little ones, but with you, I discovered something i never imagined possible... that you could love someone else more than you love yourself.
Just so you know, you have an extremely sporting and wonderful Daddy. Without him, I'm sure i would've fallen flat on my back. And without him as well, we both know that the house would be dull. :)
At one week old, you were so tiny i was afraid that i might break you.
At one month old, you were big enough to fit into the first piece of cloth we ever bought for you, the ralph lauren jumper.
At two months old, we set fort in Bukit Bandaraya Shah Alam.
At three months old, you had your first fever, which kept me awake... and on the phone 24/7.
At four months, we went holidaying Down Under.
At five months, you started rolling over!!!
At half a year, we had a double celebration, with a mini cake at atok and wan's and a doughnut cake at grandpapa and grandmama's.
At seven months, we had to send you to Taska... :(
At eight months, your dad contracted the Influenza A virus and had to be quarantined from you for 5 days!
At nine months, you were busy moving like a soldier surrounding the house.
At ten months, you prolly have bruises from going up and down and knocking every single thing that comes into your way.
months and months to come after that, i can only imagine how you can surprise me.
Muhammad Adam Danish.
=)
i love that no matter how imperfect i am as a human being, i'll always be a mummy to you.
most importantly, i love you.

more money = more problems

my babe and i was talking in the middle of our break from work and we discussed how when you have more money, more problems were sure to come soon after. ie. i got my kutu money and my teeth needed some maintenance done. and a friend of mine got her bonus and her a/c kaputted on her. why is it that the universe won't allow us to be wealthy for a long period of time? maybe we don't deserve it yet. maybe the universe knows that we will spend every extra cent on something we have a lot of like shoes... or clothes... and end up regretting soon after we left the shop.

i finally went to the dentist alone yesterday. a LOT of emotion came over me. and it didn't help that i had to wait for another 45 minutes before i was called in. but it was all over in 10 minutes and i'm soooooooooooo glad that i survived it!

im sure a lot of friends can relate to this when i say i hate driving nowadays. everyone is in a hurry to get to somewhere. driving on the left lane when he wants turn right. cutting queues. driving slow on a fast lane. turning without a signal! that is my pet peeve. although i'm prolly so used to it that i may be guilty of this too... sometimes... ;)

on a more serious note, i almost had a heart attack when i lost my dad's personal pendrive this morning. it took almost the whole office running around outside the office, in the rain, trying to find the pendrive. after almost an hour of searching, we finally found it in the drain with the help of Kak Ita's torchlight. haih... imagine the catastrophy that could have happened if we didn't find the pendrive. thanks everyone who helped!!! i owe u guys!

finally, im rested n ready for my holiday in the east coast. balik kampunggggggggggggggggggggggggg.... wooo oooo ooooo balik kampungggggggggggggg.... hehehe... my sotong goreng... my running away from katak. stay tune for stories of city girl going into the kampung!

toodles.

i want to burn off some of my kutu money at kassa searching for something to wear for the wedding this saturday... =)

raya + weddings + fatness + brokeness + pictures + going aways + whatever else

it's been a while since i posted... anything.
anyway, to me loyal 2/3 readers, selamat hari raya! maaf zahir & batin!
adam had his first Syawal with matching bajus and everything...
and 6 pairs of baju raya thanks to Wan & Grandmama
oh n lots and lots of duit raya (don't worry, it's all safe in the bank... in HIS bank!)
oh feast ur eyes on my little one...

Adam Danish enjoying the spotlight

Oh my sister (the infamous Auntie Palin) went to do her masters on the first week of Syawal. She's currently with mummy having good food at M&S in the UK. Ahhh... so jealous! InsyaAllah if the ASB divident is good and Adam walks fast, we will be making our way there in 2010. *wink wink*

Other than that, abah had his 52nd birthday last monday on the 5th of October. i can tell you after the meals that we had on that day, i swear we prolly gained like 3kg on that day itself. breakfast of roti pisang (my own fault), a very elaborate lunch at Siriwan Thai and a heavy hi-tea of pizza hut (stuffed crust and all) and the very very very scrumptous New York Cheesecake from Secret Recipe. and Sari Ratu for dinner. I love food... but not all good food in all day. my body CAN NOT get used to this!

This weekend im heading to Terengganu again for a wedding full of crisis. Tok Kie's eldest cucu from his second marriage. a girl marrying a... controversial man that she has known no longer than one year. scary isn't it. i think everyone is excited to see how the wedding pans out... me too, if not i wouldn't be so eager to drive for 5 hours for a weekend. and also... the sotong goreng. one of the reasons why we're going there again... coz we missed the sotong goreng during raya time.

Oh and Adam has learn the art of sitting... and climbing. it's a bit tiring to take care of him now since he climbs everything he can... including yours truly. it's a joy to watch surely... and thank God for the walker coz if it isnt' for the walker, i wouldn't be able to do anything at all. :).

i'm heading off to subang parade in an hour to buy adam's trolley cum walker cum toy since i have some extra cash thanks to the kutu... :)

see yah!

my desperate attempt in putting every single thing that happened in a very long time in words... observe...

my attempt starts now...

HAPPY RAMADHAN everyone!!! this year ramadhan is even more special cause i have my own family, and we have our own house.

oh oh the one thing that caught my eye yesterday while i was on the way back from picking up apple crumble from my parent's place (tq mummy) was...
a guy, old enough to be my father i think (cause he has gray hair) brisk walking under the scorching hot sun in RAMADHAN with his ipod and reading... wait for it, the Holy Quran.
i was stunned with nothing but respect for this man... i wouldn't imagine myself...
1. walking outside
2. under the hot sun
3. during Ramadhan
whoever you are, i respect you n hope to be you someday.

lets see, what's next...
oh yeah... in the light of what is happening in Malaysia, my husband caught the Influenza A virus. as a result of that, we have isolated him from our son, Muhammad Adam Danish... which although was the right thing to do, was hard for the both of us. We had to spend the first day of Ramadhan separate. N Adam didn't get to see daddy for 5 days! But everything went back to normal yesterday and although Awan is still wearing a mask, at least he was around. And i got back to being my lazy self while watching DVD until i fell asleep.

Oh yes, Nur Aiman Qistina, my brother's baby girl is officially one year old today... so happy bday qish qish!!! i love you no matter how naughty you are. =)

Nur Aiman Qistina (1 year young)

What else can i cramp into this post... Oh yeah, starting next week, we will be baking our kuihs for hari raya. We managed to get 50 orders. That's not bad for beginners right? he he he... can't wait! baking with good company is really fun. Half the time is gone with the three of us crapping away... next week... TO THE OVEN!!!

gotta get back to work! see you later!

when mummy meets pedro...

last sunday, mummy went depressed and crazy.
she woke up late.
practically persuaded hubby to go buy breakfast.
and slept for another 2 hours.
woke up.
felt extremely hungry.
and cooked indomee. or was it ibumie?
anyway, mummy wasn't happy..
she needed to see pedro...
pedro... ooo pedro...
pedro was super special coz hubby got pedro too...
im talking about the shoes...
haaa.... shoes....
even better... paid-by-someone-else-shoes...
heaven... hahahaha!

other than that, this mummy is on a mission to finish all her work...
which is impossible... but mama's maid is coming home soon so at least my house is settled. the unfolded mountain of clothes and un-ironed clothes will be put to it's place. yay!

mr adam danish is gallivanting all over the house in his walker. we even had to reconfigure our furniture so that he could walk around the house. i miss him.

oh and as for the drama drama drama in my life, i have decided to put a blind eye to it.
why? you may ask... because... i don't care about you enough to let you ruin my mood.
i don't like it when you mess with my friends.
me being somewhat superior to other people doesn't mean that i'm a normal person.
f*ck you losers. you are shallow and so kampung-like.
i particularly lose respect to those who talk behind other people's back.
i have been nothing but nice to you and you had to stab all over that by... i don't know what you did... or how you did... but you are spiteful. and you don't deserve any attention from us. from now on, you are just a person i see almost everyday. you to me as good as a mannequin in the shop windows. lifeless and heartless.

in the mad search for perfection

one of the criteria to being a messed up mummy is the stubborness and unwillingness to accept the fact that perfection doesn't happen.

notwithstanding the fact that i have a great life, i also have too many unfinished business.
my credit card bills, my overbubbling evolving work, my desire to start a small cookie business, my erupting volcano of unfolded clothes...

this is me not trying to whine, cause i know despite of my lil baggages, i have an amazing hubby, gorgeous son, amazing family, extremely fun and supportive workmates and gorgeous friends. i have the best support system anyone could imagine.

so amazing that i keep on having amazing weekends after amazing weekends. last night my friends agreed to stay overnight at my place as the hubby was away at Langkawi. we cooked dinner, and our lasagne was ready just before midnight and we feasted while watching Confessions of a Shopaholic before dozing off in front of the TV. ahh... bliss.

we woke up late, (as expected) but made it to work only 11 minutes late! not bad huh? anyway, tomorrow i'm bringing adam to get his shots. then we have a housewarming event at Aishah's place which i can't wait since i can't even remember when was the last time we met!

oh and we're making cookie samples again tomorrow! :)

we've sold 24 'balangs' and we need more!!!

mad weekend!

i had an awesome weekend last week. it started with...

Exhibit 1:
sample making for our mini business. (if you can call it a business)
here are the finished product...
sugi @ Rm18/50 pieces
chocolate nestum @ RM20/50 pieces
pineapple tart @ RM23/50 pieces
you see for now we only have 3 products as we are starting small... so that we could focus on the yumminess!

chocolate nestum in the making

sugi on a platter

melt-in-your-mouth tarts

OH OH... and then we had a roadtrip to batu pahat for our colleagues wedding! pictures on the way since i have used my limit for photo capacity. :)

on the way back, our wee family stopped in Malacca for an overnite stay in Renaissance Hotel. Gorgeous place with complimentary baby cot. and junk food basket and a plate of gourmet chocolate. so good especially after that 4 hour long drive.

came back on sunday and the three of us got affected with very very bad food poisoning and had MC for 2 days. not a very good ending to our weekend but at least the three of us had some quality time together, on the bed! :p

will be back with the photos. i promise!

the lowest of low

it's been quite sometime since i last felt down, angry and sad all at once.
work has been bugging me, as usual.
however, what was the most stable thing for me suddenly was shaken to the core just yesterday.
and it was the tip of a very sensitive iceberg.
maybe it's time to let go, yes...
but to ask me to let go only for a while... and without the decency to give me time to adjust, that is just low.
i am angry because eventho i am a mother first, i still have work and can not abandon at short notice.
i am sad because that person expected me to alter my feelings
and i am down because for a long time now i haven't been able to complete anything without having something else coming in the way.

my little khalifah!

i've been wanting to put this photo up for so long! finally someone (my sis) was kind enough to upload it and my mum emailed it to me today. so people, enjoy. he is my one and only prince, my Muhammad Adam Danish, the reason why i still have my crazy routine at work, so i could provide the best for him. it's amazing how when he smiles, all your troubles could melt away... so here, hopefully he could make u smile too!

cheers, mummy adam!

~my new pen & bracelet~

i am a true believer in karma...
having said that, i've been very content with my life for a while now...

oh before i babble on further, thank you wani n katy for the beautiful named pen and bracelet for my belated birthday!!!
life in the office has been helluva lot better since we triple team-ed and did havoc around the office.
hehehe... wani kat meeting skrang so caca bosan.
balik laaaaaaaaaaaaa....

i actually had something else to say but ive lost my train of thoughts thanks to my husband asking for QS advice, free of charge!

i'll be back!

Me & my lil family

isn't it amazing how a photo can make you feel so relaxed. with just that one photo, you forget for a second those people who pretends, those who dictates and those who you secretly wish you could kill. With me, it's the photo of my little boy growing up in front of my very eyes and the very involved father he has playing with him and making sure that he has everything.

it doesn't matter if we were broke at the end of the month. or we scratch our heads thinking of ways to settle our bills. when he smiles, or in this case, when i look at his photo, every problem seems minimal.

oh yes, I am also thankful for my friends who relieve me from mummy duty and my hubby who lets me have MY time. :)

so i may bitch about the clients everyday other day or so...
and i may not have enough money to last me till the end of each month...
or get to go gallivanting all around due to the latest influenza A virus...
or even have enough time at home to UNPACK!

but i love my life. i love my little family. i love my friends. i love the emptiness amidst the love. i love my messy cupboard. my messy "filing" area. my very basic bathrooms. my 2 boxes full of unfolded clothes.

because it's mine. =D

bing bang BOOM!

firstly, i turned a quarter of a century last friday.
but i had a very eventful birthday weekend altogether.
it started with a very annoying client haunting me every second.
then running around getting food for my office.
n then cleaning the office for our doa selamat.
and then the doa selamat.
and then... the BIG SURPRISE!
to make it short, i thought my house were invaded with hantu and penyamun and i shouted as if they are trying to kill me and then hid behind my bed.
it all ended well but left me shaken for at least 20 minutes!
but i have to give it to Awan's siblings - they made my birthday a hell lot of fun... and also prolly shorten my lifespan by about 5 years!
and that was FRIDAY ALONE.
and then there's saturday where we went to the hospital for Adam's shots... and had a very torturous dinner at Restoran Tasik Indah. We pre-ordered for 7 but my brother n sis-in-law couldn't make it since baby Qistina is unwell. The restaurant prolly cooked for 9! so imagine 5 adults trying to finish a meal made for 9!
Oh yeah, Sunday was Father's Day. HAPPY FATHER's DAY to my dad and ADAM's DADDY!!!
we stayed at home most of the day except for breakfast at my parent's place. Waited for our favourite married couple, Fizah and Kopi to come visit for tea but instead... i should've known better, she arrived just in time for DINNER!
cooked Fried Kway Teow and Taufu Telur Goreng and SAmbal kicap without the sambal...
played Wii, laughed until we cried - Go HULA HULA FIZAH!!! and had Creme Caramel that i had made earlier to close the day. They left around 11 and we got ready for bed as we had to go to work the next day... :(
anyway, i had an amazing birthday weekend!
thanks everyone!!!

XOXO

happy 1/2 year my baby boy!

Muhammad Adam Danish is 6 months old today!!!
my lasak, white cotton baby is finally 6 months old.
=)
all i can say is... i pat myself for successfully taking care of another human being without putting him in major harm. hahahaha...
now... where can i get half a cake?

mundane MONDAY!

today depicts perfectly what a Monday represent to us working people.
It rained heavily when i woke up at 4am for Adam's feed.
and by 7.30 a.m. the weather was nice, cooling and moody.
This is what the weekend is supposed to be! Not MONDAY!
anyway, despite the very hot weather, i rather enjoyed my weekend.
Oh, I found my hari raya kain! now, if only i know where to send for tailoring.
and.. Adam has learn the art of rumbling tumbling all over the house. ok well, maybe not the house but the living room, which has sent us very concerned parents to the curve to buy his babyden. Awan came home last night and assembled and decorated the den. it's like a cute Adam's only spot, only covered with bars! oh well, it doesn't matter to me what people might think about me putting my baby in the cage but i'd rather know that he's safe inside with his toys rather than rolling around the house.
anyhuu...
lots and lots more work come tumbling in today. in addition, the phonelines are not working, which is a plus in some extend. :) but also a hassle in a lot of ways.
i guess i should get a start on, huh?
here i go lazily looking at this stupid drawing that has been revised for the thousandth time...
*boohoo*

fasting moi

today after a very very long hiatus of puaseness i have decided to resume paying back my "fast days" as i don't have many days till the next Ramadhan.

as a result of that, my other fasting colleague decided to walk around and look at some cloths for baju raya. the designs were endless and i find myself confused as to which design i should go for this year. this year would be extremely special as it is my first raya with my son and my husband WITHOUT a big bump on my tummy.

so yeah, i used to be the ones who think same coloured cloths on raya is tacky but I am proudly stating that i am doing the same thing this year. :D

oh, and adam is loving the banana smoothie that he gets to have every evening. and he keeps on getting his arms stuck in his cot at night cause eversince he learns how to rollover, he's been doing it non stop. also, i was bored so i went around jobstreet and found a very interesting job in Dubai. i am contemplating sending my resume in just for funs sake... who knows, i may be dubai-worthy. hahaha...

i still love Malaysia though. Foreign countries are fun for holiday purposes but when it comes to having a life, i guess i still love my Malaysia. altho, ironically people call me melayu celup.

oh oh and im having my birthday soon! ISO meeting urgent la plak. haih...

mummy writes... again!

it's been too long since i last write... something. well, something other than office work. anyway since i am finally a little relaxed in the office, i thought i might give it a go.
Let me start with a simple introduction...
as of almost 6 months ago, i became a mummy for the first time.
and moved into a house 2 months after that.
started a love hate relationship with my body.
went travelling down under.
went back to my new hometown on the east coast.
and moved office.

to make things even shorter, my life hasn't been dull for a while.
and i have to say, i miss the dullness.

as a working wife, life wasn't too hectic.
but as a working wife + mummy, i cherish any 5 minutes nap i could get.
not to say i don't love my life. i really do.
not many people my age get to live my life...
but sometimes i wish i could be single.

i always think life is fair.
just when you think you can't handle it anymore, life throws a curveball at you.
this happened last weekend.

1. my baby rolled over numerous times and everytime he does it, he'll smile at me as if to show off.
2. i got sick and had the royal treatment from my husband.
3. i got to STAY AT HOME!!!
4. i had the long overdue girls outing...

while the first 3 is self explanatory, i would like to elaborate further on no. 4.
my babes decided to have lunch at la bodega in bangsar... this is because she is moving to JB :(
huwaaaaa... my batu which i call when i got off late from work and go "HUWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" is now gonna be milesssss away.
i know we don't usually meet up but knowing that she is around always makes me happy.
but she's going there with the one that she loves. so... i let her go. i think! :)
AND... another babe is getting married!!! this december and she wants us to be her bridesmaid... so that gives a jumpstart to my love hate relationship with my body.

:) i have to go back to work. and i do apologize for the incredibly long entry as... i have been wanting to write for a longggggggggggggggggggggggggg time!

you get it, don't you? ;)

xox